Thursday, July 29, 2010

Taco Hell

So no clients today due to staff meeting. But no worries! One of my co-workers shared something just as entertaining. Apparently she was there once when UPS delivered the ground beef to Taco Bell... which is kind of disturbing in itself... and on the package it read, "Grade D, But Edible."

So thank you Taco bell for caring about your customers SO much that you scrape the crap from the bottom of the barrel so they will never have to go without those fancy tacos.


USDA (grading)

USDA (meat facts)

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Wait, babies need to eat??

Today a mother with a 6 month old baby came to talk with me for an "infant assessment." I took a complete dietary intake for a typical 24 hours for this baby. So what is this baby eating? 1-2 8oz bottles of formula....are you looking for the rest? Yeah me too. NO Food and only 8-16oz of formula! How this baby is still alive I may never know.

Babies are people too- FEED THEM!


6 month old feeding schedule

A word from the Experts

Two Generations of Stupidity

14, yes fourteen year old girl today came in with her 2 week old baby. Tells me her DOCTOR told her to give the baby water...cause that's believable. So this baby is getting 3 8oz bottles of water a day. My first thought, this is why babies shouldn't be having babies. Ok so she doesn't know why the doctor told her this but says he explained it to her mother, who is in the lobby. So I go out to find grandma, and grandma has an attitude I'm pretty sure she brought just for me. Grandma tells me this, "OH no, I am giving her water because I WANT to! Water is good for babies!" Is that right? Now I'm not sure what her definition of "good is" but last time i checked, that much water can kill a baby. I explained to her what water intoxication is and how easy it is for a baby to get this. What response do I get... She looks at me with this face that says **** you, then says, "FINE, I won't give her any water." Gee I'm so sorry it is such an inconvenience for you to make sure you don't kill your grandchild.

Ending Thought: This is why stupid people shouldn't have babies.


Infant Water Intoxication: todaysparent

One more word on water

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Only EIGHT

A couple months ago I had a 17 year old pregnant girl in my office. She had marked on the questionnaire that she drinks soda. It's typical that I will ask how much they are drinking each day, and it's normally 1-3 cups...... This girl looked me in the eyes, cool as could be and said, ... "like 19 bottles, but now since I'm pregnant only 8."

oh ok good. Well your probably ONLY going to develop gestational Diabetes.


Diabetes & Soda

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Hygiene is a Four Letter Word?

There are 3 main smells that permeate from the WIC office on a regular basis...

1. Cigarette smoke- why does your 2 year old reek of cigarettes?
2. Cat urine- I don't care if your used to it, I'm not. Clean that litter box much? Didn't think so.
3. Body Odor- Don't pretend like you can't smell your own BO, If I can smell you across the room, I know you can smell yourself.

So Please, smoke outside, take a shower, and for God's sake...or at least mine, put on deodorant.

The blonde girl with glasses

After I finished counceling this woman about her son for a good 20 minutes, I sent her out to the lobby to fill out a short survey. She turned it in to one of the clerks and said, "Here, the lady with the blonde hair and glasses gave me this." I have dark brown hair and do not wear glasses.

Someone's IQ is clearly off the charts.

Bacon has no Carbs, Suprise!

A couple months ago I was working in another WIC clinic when I saw this pregnant lady. She said she had been on a "low-carb" diet for a while and had lost a good amount of weight. When I attempted to explain to her that she would need to put this diet on hold while she was pregnant, she insisted on telling me her whole life story, along with showing me serveral different pictures of herself from over the years as well as a few different drivers liscence pictures of herself at different weights. Needless to say I got way more than I had bargained for. An hour later, when she finally stopped rambling, I sent her up to get her checks from the clerk, who ironically was on some sort of "high-carb" diet. I then heard the woman tell the clerk, "You probably don't know this, but bacon has no carbs!"

Look out for this woman's book..."How I lost 200 Pounds Eating Bacon"
(I'd check in the fiction section)